第十九章（第3/9页）

And he lay with a queer, blank face like a child, with a bit of the wonderment of a child. And he would gaze on her with wide, childish eyes, in a relaxation of madonna worship. It was sheer relaxation on his part, letting go all his manhood, and sinking back to a childish position that was really perverse. And then he would put his hand into her bosom and feel her breasts, and kiss them in exultation, the exultation of perversity, of being a child when he was a man.

他躺在床上，脸上的表情如同孩子般古怪茫然，甚至闪烁着好奇的神色。他会睁大眼睛注视着她，松弛于对圣母的崇拜中。他完全卸去自己的防卫，抛却所有男人的尊严，堕回到乖戾的孩提时代。他会把手伸进她的怀里，抚摸着她的乳房，疯狂地亲吻着它们，体验着从男人变回男孩的错乱情感。

Mrs. Bolton was both thrilled and ashamed, she both loved and hated it. Yet she never rebuffed nor rebuked him. And they drew into a closer physical intimacy, an intimacy of perversity, when he was a child stricken with an apparent candour and an apparent wonderment, that looked almost like a religious exaltation: the perverse and literal rendering of: "except ye become again as a little child'. While she was the Magna Mater, full of power and potency, having the great blond childman under her will and her stroke entirely.

博尔顿太太又喜又羞，既爱且恨。可她从不会拒绝或是责备他。两人的肉体关系变得更加亲密，这种反常的亲密让他变回孩子，毫不掩饰自己的天真和好奇，几乎可以跟宗教狂热媲美，这似乎是对那句话的曲解：“除非你们再次变成婴儿（注：‘婴儿’出自《圣经·马太福音》）”。而她则变成伟大的圣母玛利亚，拥有无穷的力量，让这个金发大孩子完全臣服于自己的意志和抚爱。

The curious thing was that when this childman, which Clifford was now and which he had been becoming for years, emerged into the world, it was much sharper and keener than the real man he used to be. This perverted childman was now a real businessman; when it was a question of affairs, he was an absolute heman, sharp as a needle, and impervious as a bit of steel. When he was out among men, seeking his own ends, and 'making good' his colliery workings, he had an almost uncanny shrewdness, hardness, and a straight sharp punch. It was as if his very passivity and prostitution to the Magna Mater gave him insight into material business affairs, and lent him a certain remarkable inhuman force. The wallowing in private emotion, the utter abasement of his manly self, seemed to lend him a second nature, cold, almost visionary, businessclever. In business he was quite inhuman.

奇怪的是，克利福德终于结束经年累月的蜕变，以大孩子的形象出现在世间，但却比以往那个男人更加精明敏锐。如今，这个扭曲的大孩子成为真正的业界精英。当涉及到自身的利益，他便成为如假包换的男子汉，敏锐如针，坚硬如钢。当他暂别拉格比，与其他男人角力，为实现既定的目标，为推动自家矿场的发展，他都表现出不可思议的狡黠、冷酷与果敢。似乎是他被动献身于圣母的举动，赋予他对事业发展的敏锐洞察力，获得无人能及的超凡力量。当沉浸在个人感情里，他的男子气概降到冰点，而这反倒让他获得某种第二天性：冷静客观，几乎是高瞻远瞩，精于事业。在事业领域，他的确超凡脱俗。

And in this Mrs. Bolton triumphed. "How he's getting on!” She would say to herself in pride. "And that's my doing! My word, he'd never have got on like this with Lady Chatterley. She was not the one to put a man forward. She wanted too much for herself.” At the same time, in some corner of her weird female soul, how she despised him and hated him! He was to her the fallen beast, the squirming monster. And while she aided and abetted him all she could, away in the remotest corner of her ancient healthy womanhood she despised him with a savage contempt that knew no bounds. The merest tramp was better than he.

对此，博尔顿太太颇为自得。“他多么出色！”她充满自豪地对自己说。“这全是我的功劳！哎哟，查泰来夫人在时，他可从来没这样优秀过。她可不是位好贤内助。她太过自私自利。”而与此同时，在那奇异女性灵魂的某个角落里，她又是那样鄙视和憎恶着他！对她而言，他只不过是头被撂倒的野兽，只知挣扎、坐以待毙的怪物。她竭尽所能地帮助他，鼓励他，而在内心深处，那古老理智的女性本能却对他抱有极端的鄙视和轻蔑。就连最卑微的乞丐都比他强。

His behaviour with regard to Connie was curious. He insisted on seeing her again. He insisted, moreover, on her coming to Wragby. On this point he was finally and absolutely fixed. Connie had promised to come back to Wragby, faithfully.

他对待康妮的态度让人不解。他坚持要再见她一面。而且，他坚持要她回到拉格比。在这一问题上，他是那样的坚定与决绝。康妮曾经信誓旦旦地许诺，保证会重返拉格比。

"But is it any use?" said Mrs. Bolton. "Can't you let her go, and be rid of her?” "No! She said she was coming back, and she's got to come.” Mrs. Bolton opposed him no more. She knew what she was dealing with.

“可这又有什么用呢？”博尔顿太太问。“难道您就不能放她走，跟她划清界限吗？”“不！她曾答应过会回来，就必须兑现诺言。”博尔顿太太不再提出反对意见。她深知克利福德的脾气秉性。

I needn't tell you what effect your letter has had on me (he wrote to Connie to London). Perhaps you can imagine it if you try, though no doubt you won't trouble to use your imagination on my behalf.

（他给身在伦敦的康妮写信。）你的来信究竟对我造成怎样的影响，我无须向你言明。如果你能站在我的角度设想一下，或许就会心知肚明，但想必你不会设身处地地为我着想，这点毫无疑问。

I can only say one thing in answer: I must see you personally, here at Wragby, before I can do anything. You promised faithfully to come back to Wragby, and I hold you to the promise. I don't believe anything nor understand anything until I see you personally, here under normal circumstances. I needn't tell you that nobody here suspects anything, so your return would be quite normal. Then if you feel, after we have talked things over, that you still remain in the same mind, no doubt we can come to terms. Connie showed this letter to Mellors.

我的答复只需这一句话便能概括：在做出任何行动之前，我必须在拉格比见到你。你曾经信誓旦旦地许诺过要重回拉格比，我希望你履行自己的诺言。除非我能在这里见到你，一如往常，否则我不会相信或理解任何事。我无须向你说明，这里的人都不曾怀疑过什么，所以你的归来是再自然不过的事情。详谈过后，如果你依然不愿改变主意，那么我们会找到解决的方法。康妮把信拿给梅勒斯看。